Echoes of the Past
by jibber59
Summary: No matter how far he's come, there will always be times Ezra will have to deal with who he was (Warnings for violence and language - nothing extreme, but you might want to keep the young'uns away.)
1. Chapter 1

Josiah nodded at Ezra as they passed on the street. The big man was coming back from doing the rounds to the south of the town. Ezra, having the day off, was strolling about town. To a casual observer he was simply out stretching his legs. Those who knew him knew he was taking in every change, every activity, every nuance that made Four Corners what it was. Observation was critical to him at all times, and very little slipped by.

"Quiet ride this morning Mr. Sanchez?"

"Relatively. Looks like someone may be squatting out at the old Carleton place. Don't think anybody bought the land, but there is a campsite there. Couple of small wagons. Nobody was around when I checked. Maybe out scavenging for food."

"I haven't noticed any unfamiliar faces in town, so whoever it is hasn't made it this far yet. I have no doubt Mr. Larabee will deem it necessary to look further into the matter."

"Well if he does, he can take someone else with him. I've done my time in the saddle for the day. I don't mind keeping watch here in town if I'm needed, but I'm getting to old to spend more time riding if I don't have to.

"Are you feeling poorly Josiah?" His worry in noting the fatigue in the older man's voice and on his face had him dropping the formality without even being aware of it. Josiah hid the smile that would have shown his pleasure at the concern.

"Nothing amiss Ezra. Just a few sleepless nights and early mornings. Can't seem to shake the feeling that something is off."

"As long as there are none of your black birds on the horizon."

"Skies are clear. Don't be wasting your time worrying about it."

"Concern for the welfare of another is never a waste of time my friend. You have told me that more than once. You take the time to get some rest. I shall cover the town watch should Mr. Larabee recruit the others for his latest investigation." He casually saluted as he continued his stroll, nodding his greetings to everyone he passed along the way. As he distanced himself out of sight, Josiah allowed the smile he'd been hiding to surface.

He doubted to his very soul the idea that such a conversation would have taken place two years earlier. Even if Ezra had felt that kind of kinship, the notion of expressing it, of letting down his defenses, would have been unthinkable. He wouldn't have dared take the risk. Fear of genuine emotions was that deeply entrenched. Sadly, his mother had taught him well. But now, time seemed to have healed at least some of the scars of his childhood. Ezra had become the one thing he never would have envisioned – he was a part of a community. And watching him interact with the people of the town, Josiah amended that to a respected member of the community. He shook his head, still smiling. He was completely convinced Ezra had never even seen it coming.

7-7-7-7-7-7-7

The prediction had been accurate. Within minutes of hearing about the camp outside of town Chris and Vin had set out on their way. Despite what Josiah had told them, they were surprised to see the home itself untouched. In the east pasture two small wagons marked the only sign of activity. A soberly dressed man stood as the drew near.

"Greetings and blessing brethren. Welcome to my humble home. May I offer you tea?"

"Thanks, no. Name's Larabee, this here is Tanner. We were wondering if you thinking of moving in here."

"No sire, not for the long term. Might I enquire as to your authority to ask the question? Are you the possessors of this domain? I endeavored to seek out such individuals, but the property appears deserted."

"He talks like Ezra," Vin mumbled softly to Chris. In a louder voice, he answered the questions. "Not sure as I'd call it authority. We more or less represent the law in Four Corners. That's the town your closest to. We kinda like to keep up on what's going on in the area."

"Of course. How fortunate for the inhabitants of your hamlet that the are blessed with such vigilant and astute watchers. Forgive me. I have not returned the courtesy of your introductions. I am the Reverend William Joseph Tomlinson, but please call me Brother Bill." He stood and took a step closer.

The lawmen both nodded, but neither responded to the offered handshake. "You aiming at setting up operations here abouts?" Chris asked. He wasn't sure how Josiah would feel about that. The ongoing work at building the church to his satisfaction was getting closer to completion, but, based on his continued work, was unfinished. What passed for services in the town were held there, weather permitting until the roof was finished. Josiah sometimes led the prayers, but as often as not it was more a gathering of the faithful, or those with something they were praying for, who ran the show.

"Oh, no. I don't have the calling from the Lord to serve in a single location. I am what is colloquially referred to as an itinerant man of God. Traveling through the lands, spreading the Good Word and saving souls, much as Jesus did."

"Pretty high company you are associating yourself with." Vin observed.

"I would never intentionally presume to imply such a comparison, I assure you. I am merely attempting to indicate the nature of my calling."

"I'm sure Vin meant nothing by it Reverend. So, you planning on a Sunday service here then?"

"I do hope to have the opportunity to share my relationship with our Lord with the members of the community. I find communing with God in the open – in His church as it were – to be powerful and moving experience. Presuming there are no objections from the land owner of course.

"Carleton headed back east a few months ago. Land is still for sale. Can't see the harm in what you have in mind, provided there's no damage done."

"Excellent. I shall consult with your preacher prior to my undertaking any activities."

"We don't really have a what you'd call a proper preacher in town. Had a few so-called men of God come through. Never ended particularly well." Chris informed him, curious to see the response.

"Yes, sadly not all men who preach the Word are indeed suited to the responsibility. I shall endeavour to alter that record for you. Is there someone I should discuss the possibility of a Sunday service with? Or perhaps a service Saturday evening would be less intrusive to his plans."

Vin laughed. "Doubt that you'd get too many souls out here on a Saturday night Brother. Town is kind of occupied with less pious pursuits, as Ezra would call them."

"Ezra?" he asked. "Would that be the name of your preacher then?" This time both men laughed before Vin answered again.

"No, he's more like to be the man leading the less pious pursuits. You'd be looking for Josiah. We can ask him to ride out to meet with you tomorrow if you'd like."

"That would be most considerate of you. I trust I will see you gentlemen at my service."

"Depends on whether there is work to be done. One way or another, I expect we'll meet up again."

"I look forward to the opportunity."

One Chris was certain they'd ridden far enough his voice wouldn't carry back he spoke.

"He remind you of anybody Vin?"

"Doesn't look like anyone I've seen on the posters."

"No, that ain't it. Can't really put my finger on it, just a general impression I guess."

"Well, he sure talks like someone we know."

Chris smiled. "Yeah, he's got Ezra's gift of gab. Slicker sounding somehow though. I mean, even when Ezra is – guess I should say was – conning someone, he sounded like he meant every word he said."

"That's what made him so damn good at it."

"This guy though, he's just off somehow."

"Don't disagree. And you know Josiah ain't gonna like this Chris. You know how he feels about these traveling preachers. And with good reason."

"I don't much trust him either, but as of this point, he's done nothing wrong. Not the first man to set up camp on what looks like vacant land. Nothing stolen or damaged that we can tell."

"So," Vin reasoned "you figure by playin' along we can keep an eye on things without making him suspicious."

"If he's up to no good, he's already suspicious. If he's planning on running some kind of game, he'll get his own surprise though."

Vin grinned. "You got that right. When it comes to con men, we've got an ace up our sleeves."

M7-M7-M7-M7-M7-M7-M7

 ** _tbc_**


	2. Chapter 2

"Why do you continue to assume that I am associated with every confidence artist plying his trade, Mr. Larabee?"

"Settle down Ezra. I don't mean anything by it. What I do know is that you like to make sure you know your competition, and if this guy has been around for a while, and I bet he has, then you may have run into him before."

"If he is proclaiming himself to be a man of God it is far more likely that Josiah will know of him that I would.

"Well, 'claims' is the important word there. I have my doubts about the truth of that statement."

"Mr. Larabee – are you becoming a cynic?" The others at the table grinned at the question. Cynicism was nothing new to Chris.

"A realist. He don't ring true, but I can't say why. Maybe we've just had to many false prophets. Anyway, I did ask Josiah.

"Can't say the name or description is familiar to me, but then I've been away from preaching a lot longer than you've been away from –" he hesitated, unsure how to finish the thought.

"My former line of work?"

"Yeah – that'll do."

Ezra sighed and put down the deck of card. "Tell me what you can. Start with a description. We can get to what he said, how he said it and what he didn't say after that."

Chris leaned back. Clearly this was going to take some time.

"I'd say he was 'bout your height, maybe a bit more. Dark hair with a bit of grey. No scars I could see."

"Sounds right." Vin agreed. "Clean shaven. Think his eyes were brown?"

"That's it." Ezra questioned when they stopped. "That is the sum total of your observations? No small wonder he in unfamiliar to you Mr. Sanchez. His mother wouldn't recognize him on such little information."

"Well I can tell you what he was wearing for what good that does." Chris added angrily.

"All this time I thought you paid more attention to your surroundings gentlemen. No, I suppose that isn't fair. I have no doubt you pay attention. You simply fail to note the details. I am certain you saw more than what you have described, and with a small amount of coaching will recall not only the facts, but a multitude of observations and presumptions based on those recollections.

Let us start with the clothing that you are dismissive of. Were the cuffs frayed? Did the buttons match, or were they an amalgam of whatever might serve the purpose? Did the jacket match with the pants – fabric, fit, style? Shoes or boots? Designed for walking or working? Were the garments cut in a fashion to disguise the possession of a weapon, or did they hang naturally? Did he carry a handkerchief? Folded neatly out of years of conditioning, or merely stuck into the pocket?"

They all stared at the line questioning, no one speaking.

"His appearance then. How long since his last haircut? Professionally done, of self cut? Was the colour natural, or was there boot black or other substance altering the effect? Trying to appear younger? Older? Spectacles? Were they needed, or being used to affect the appearance of wisdom or sincerity? You said he was clean shaven. Was the skin equally tanned over the face, or was the absence of facial hair a recent change? His hands, smooth or calloused? I trust you took the opportunity to shake hands to assess their condition as well as his strength.

"Are you messing with us Ezra?" JD interrupted. "You expect them to answer all of this?"

"We've only begun. Did his voice maintain an even timber, or was there a variance in the range? Was there an accent? Consistent? Identifiable? Then of course there is rhythm of speech. Did he rush some thoughts, as if seeking to be able to change the subject? Did he look you in the eye when he spoke, or was the gaze focused more on your chin or neck? And we have not even begun to address his vocabulary and choice of phrasing and patterns."

Ezra stopped, looking at them to provide answers. No one spoke for at least a minute. Finally, he broke the silence he had created.

"Well?"

"You have got to be kidding us Ezra." Buck sputtered out. "Who notices all of that?"

"Everyone does Mr. Wilmington. That is the point. The eye takes in all of that, and a great deal more. The trick is allowing the mind to register, retain and process the information. And then draw the necessary conclusions to enable you to size up your opponent."

"That's crazy."

"No, it isn't Buck." Chris grinned. "I get what he's saying."

"I thought you might Mr. Larabee. You do the exact same thing every time you face down a challenger before drawing your gun. Mr. Tanner, you practice your skills when tracking, noticing and analyzing every aspect of your surroundings. And even you Mr. Wilmington. I daresay you note more than that every time a beautiful woman, or for that matter any woman, crosses your path."

"This why you win more that you lose when you're playing cards Ezra?" JD asked.

"It help's. The more you observe, the more you are prepared for whatever happens next. The better you can determine the exact character of your opponent.

But no observation can be taken at face value. Fancy clothes and polished nails could reflect a man of breeding and old money. But equally, they could be the spoils of someone who has only recently come into funds, and is making the effort to appear to fit into a new social circle. One must look beyond the surface."

"How?" JD felt he should be taking notes.

"If the clothes are brand new, there is a good chance the money is too. And nails can be buffed to look good, but the weathering of the hands will tell more of a man's history than a cosmetic effort can hide. Even more than that is a comfort with the image. Pulling at the neckline of a shirt, fussing with the jacket, difficulty counting out the bills. All signs someone is unaccustomed to the wealth he portrays."

"What about you Ezra? What about the way you dress and act?"

"Do you really think I should share all my secrets with you JD? However, since you know me as well as you do, I will share this much. My overall bearing is that of a winner whenever possible. Most people make the assumption that I am then 'due' for a loss. Anyone a little more observant will note the slight wear on my garments. Not a great deal, but enough to show they are not newly acquired from a haberdashery. This will make them uncertain of my position, yet at the same time they will draw certain assumptions just from the nature of the clothing itself. The style, colour and accessories will lead most to believe I am a man who is less that cautious with his finances."

"That would be a costly assumption for anyone to make." Josiah smiled.

"As it has been for many people, on more than one occasion."

"That's all fascinating Ezra, but do you think we might get back to the matter at hand? You want some more of our observations so you can figure out this Brother Bill character for us?"

Ezra snapped his head around to stare at Chris. "Brother Bill? That is the moniker this gentleman is using?"

"Yeah – why?"

Ezra rested his head in his hands for a moment. Why could his past not stay buried behind him? When he finally looked up, Chris could see the distress in his eyes. There was little effort being made to hide it. There was no point.

"Allow me to answer some of the questions I directed at you a few minutes ago. Brother Bill would appear to be in his mid to late 30's, with a touch of grey in his hair at the temples. He appears at first glance to move stiffly. The actions of a man not used to an outdoor or overly physical life. You indicated he is clean shaven, so his face is likely tanned, but would not be weathered.

His clothing looks well used, likely fitting him loosely. It would appear they had never had a proper fitting, and could well be hand-me-downs or possibly belonging to someone who had lost significant weight due to a less than profitable life. Either way, the truth is that they would be loose enough that any weapons he would wish to hide on his person would not be noticed. I can assure you they would be quickly accessible if needed.

He is well spoken, with an extensive vocabulary that he uses with comfort and ease. I cannot be certain, but would venture to guess there is no immediately identifiable accent to his speech, but undoubtedly sounds soft-spoken and gentle."

"What aren't you telling us here Ezra?"

"Please Mr. Larabee, I will explain in minute. Is he alone?"

"Can't be certain, but we didn't see anything to make us think otherwise." Vin answered, seeing the evident stress on the gambler's face. "You OK Pard?"

Ezra nodded slightly, but his face betrayed the action. "If you will excuse me for just a moment, I will explain myself on my return." Without waiting, he stood and quickly left, heading toward his room.

"This is bad Chris. Something is definitely wrong."

"You know," Josiah noted with concern, "for all the things we've faced down, for all the stupid risks we've taken, this may be the first time I've ever seen Ezra really and truly scared."

M7-M7-M7-M7-M7-M7-M7

 ** _tbc_**


	3. Chapter 3

They sat quietly, anxiously waiting. A moment later the doors swung open signalling Ezra's return. The unyielding poker face was firmly back in place, with a determination rarely seen. He walked straight to Chris and held out his hand displaying a folded photograph. The paper was clearly cracked – the fold was not a new feature. Chris took hold of the picture, but Ezra didn't release his grip. "Is this the man? This picture is about 4 years old, and allow for the fact he may well be trying to alter his appearance at this time."

Chris looked up at Ezra for several seconds before shifting his focus to the picture. Vin was already staring at it, nodding almost to himself. "Yeah, I'm pretty sure that's him. You're right. He looks different. Like he's trying to look different, not just 'cause he's changed – you know what I mean?"

"I agree with him. I'd say this is the guy. Can you explain why you have his picture?"

Ezra was relieved to hear no accusation in the question, only curiosity. "I would rather not, but that is no longer an option."

"I take it you know our Brother Bill."

"Knew him Mr. Larabee. To my great shame, I would have to admit to more than that. This current affectation is in no small part my own creation, from a time I had hoped was long forgotten." He looked to the others, waiting for an angry response, and was surprised to hear none.

"Tell me Mr. Larabee. Are you quite certain he is traveling alone?"

"Seems to be. Has two wagons, but I'd guess one of them is for belongings and the other is more or less where he lives."

"No sign of a woman traveling with him?"

"None that we saw." Vin answered. "Should there be?"

Ezra unfolded the picture to show two others standing with the subject. The young woman was striking. Long dark hair and a smile that clearly would brighten any room. Beside her, looking at her as if she was the only woman on earth, was a younger Ezra Standish.

"I – I'm sorry Mr. Larabee. I never imagined this particular chapter of my life would return to haunt me, and certainly not to bring difficulty to this town or you gentlemen."

"I can't say that I see any trouble Ezra – least ways none that's your fault. We all knew you had a past. Most of us do. And like you said, you had no reason to expect it to bite you in the ass. So, question is what do we do about it."

"That's all? I would have assumed you needed more information concerning this history?"

"Do I need it for you to do your job?"

"No – I don't believe you do."

"Then it's your call."

Ezra thought for a moment about the choices he had. "What I would propose, if there are no objections, that I ride out, alone, to discuss the situation."

"Not so sure alone is a good idea. This guy seems to have you a mite spooked."

"Surprised would be a better word Mr. Wilmington." None of them believed that. "And while I appreciate your concern, I believe there are better than even odds that I will be able to persuade him to move on from here, alleviating the problem."

"For you and for us. Someone else will have to deal with him." Nathan pointed out.

"As has been pointed out, we have no cause to detain him at this juncture. Unless you propose we set up some kind of deception. And I can assure you, if he discovers my presence in the community, he will not be easily lured into a trap. In fact, it may be all he needs to pack his wagon and head on. All we can do is warn the lawmen in neighbouring communities of his proximity to their territory."

"I can send telegraphs for you Ezra." JD offered. He only wished there was more he could do to help his friend, but was pleased to see the gratitude for even this simple gesture.

"Thank you – that would be appreciated. I see no reason to delay the confrontation." He picked up his hat and stood. Vin matched the action. "You want company...at least for the ride?"

"Thank you, no. I need the time to determine the best presentation of the circumstances. If you have no plans however, I believe a drink or two this evening might be a needed diversion." Vin glanced quickly at Chris. He was supposed to be on patrol tonight, but for Ezra to ask him to join him like this clearly was a sign of distress. Chris saw the need as well and nodded. He'd get one of the others to cover.

"I'll be here when you get back Pard."

"Thank you – all." They watched Ezra walk out, knowing that there was nothing they could do to make whatever this was any easier, and wishing that was not the case.

7-7-7-7-7-7-7

Josiah sighed loudly and pushed the empty glass in front of him away. It had been an hour since Ezra left, and they were all still gathered at the table. JD was the only one who had left, returning right after sending the telegrams as promised. They'd all watched Ezra ride past the saloon on his way out of town. He'd changed from his signature red jacket to something far more subdued. That alone was cause for concern.

"Don't like it Chris. I don't think he should be on his own for this." Buck and JD voiced agreement with the big man.

"Look, it isn't my first choice either. But what am I supposed to do? If I force his hand on this he'll get his back up, and that won't do any of us any good. We got to trust his judgement here." He smiled wryly. "Bet that's something the young Ezra in that picture would never expect to hear said."

"The Ezra who walked outta this room would probably still be surprised by it. Sometimes I think he just can't get used to the idea he's not that guy anymore."

"Who do you think she is Chris?" JD was still thinking about the beautiful woman Ezra had clearly be smitten by.

"If I had to guess, I'd say she was the one who got away. Somehow never figured Ezra to have one of those."

"Picture might have been for some kind of game he was running." Nathan offered, not really believing it even as he spoke.

"Nah," Buck countered. "You don't hold on to something like that if it ain't for real. And you sure don't fold it to make sure the other guy can't be seen."

"Yeah – wonder why he did that."

"You didn't get a good enough look JD." Vin said sadly. "The look Ezra was giving to her? Well she was giving it to our mystery preacher. Guessing that's why he asked if there was a woman out there."

Chris sat back, seeing the picture in his mind. Damn, Vin was right. How had be missed that? Vin saw the question on Larabee's face. "You were too busy watching Ezra to pay that much attention to her. You think you made the wrong choice here?"

"I think there is more to this than we are seeing. Tell me, you think Ezra will believe that it isn't a case of not trusting him, but more not trusting any man when emotions get in the way of things?"

"Don't know." Vin answered honestly. "What I do know is if we are wrong about this, his trust could be the least of our problems."

Chris did some calculations in his head. "30-minute ride in each direction, another – what 30 minutes to talk to this guy?"

"I'd give it 15 minutes. Doubt he'll be wasting much time on catching up."

"We gonna ride out?" Buck stood, relieved to finally have something to do.

"No, we aren't. I am. If this is all a misunderstanding, there's no point having him pissed off at all of us. Besides, you have patrol, and Nathan is going to cover that for Vin."

"So, I can ride with you then." Vin reasoned.

"Well, he might be pissed off, and if that's the case he'll need at least one of us he'll still talk to. Tends to be you most of the time, so maybe you best ride along."

Josiah stood. "No reason I can't join you too. And no reason you can come up with to stop me." He looked Chris squarely in the eye. "Besides, I'm kind of interested in meeting a fellow preacher."

"No Josiah. I don't want him to think we're ganging up on him. We play this wrong and there'll be hell to pay. Chris turned back to Vin. "30 minutes, then we ride out. We'll probably meet him coming back into town, and look like fools as a result."

"I can live with that."

M7-M7-M7-M7-M7-M7-M7

 ** _tbc_**


	4. Chapter 4

"If you were trying to sneak up you did a lousy job Ezra. Saw you and Chaucer coming for quite a piece."

"There would be no rationale I am aware of that would require me to be anything but direct in my approach."

"You can drop the fancy crap with me. I know the real you. Remember?"

"No, you never did. However, that is a discussion for another time." _Like when hell freezes over_ , Ezra thought. "I have a different topic of conversation in mind."

"Heard you were settled around these parts. Look at you, all serious and sober. Don't tell me you finally got rid of that pretty red coat of yours? Ezra Standish – settled. Who'd have guessed? That **is** the name folks here know you by?"

"As it is my name, yes, that is how they know me."

"Surprised you can even remember it, given all the aliases you've used over the years."

"You'll be moving on in the morning William."

"Will I really? That wasn't exactly the plan." Ezra said nothing, but never shifted his stare. "Seriously? You want me out of town?"

"I **want** you out of the country, but since I haven't the ability to arrange that, yes, I shall settle for out of town. Out of the territory would be a wiser move, as by now our sheriff has notified other lawmen of your presence."

"You turned me in? Shit Ezra, thought we had an understanding."

"There hasn't been any kind of understanding between us for some time now. If you recall, that is why I left you to move onto other avenues."

"The way I recall things, you left because Elizabeth chose me." He smirked.

Ezra chose not to rise to the bait, containing the desire to react in a more physical manner. "And yet if the evidence is to be believed, that is no longer the case."

"That your way of asking after her?" Again, Ezra remained silent. He had not intended for the conversation to turn this way, and was anxious to bring it to a close. "Well, you're right. She decided this kind of life wasn't her style anymore. Wanted to stop drifting." He gave another evil grin. "Want to know where I left her?"

"No. She made her choice, and then made a better one from the sound of things. All I want from you is to see your departure."

William threw what was left of his coffee into the fire. "Suppose, financially speaking, there's no point to staying now. Clearly there won't be a revival meeting here come Sunday. Tell me, would it be acceptable to you and your fellow lawmen for me to stay the night? Late enough now I'd really rather not start on the road."

Ezra shrugged, nodding slightly. "As long as you move on. And don't bother coming through town on your way. You won't be welcomed."

"Really – and I'd heard Four Corners was such a friendly community. Clearly it is filled with forgiving souls, given the fact you haven't been tarred and feathered."

"I'll be coming by here tomorrow morning. I expect to see no evidence you were in the area."

"You really think you can just walk away Ezra? Screw up all my plans, drive me out of town, hell, out of the territory and just walk away?" The false friendly tone disappeared. William stood, the anger clear on his face and in his stance, any remaining pretense gone.

"What would you have me do?"

"Well, as I see it, you turning me in cost me at least a few hundred, so we can start with that. You still carry funds in your boot I would imagine."

"My funds are otherwise invested these days. And even if they weren't, I am hardly food enough to bring such sums with men when riding out to meet with an unethical reprobate."

"Really? You, of all people, calling me unethical. You forget Ezra, I know exactly who you are, and exactly what you've done. How do you think the good people of Four Corners would react to some of those stories? How do you think Larabee and Tanner and the others would? They'd kick your ass outta town so fast you wouldn't have time to pack a bag."

"They know as much of my past as they need to, and are welcome to ask questions about any incidents they choose."

"That include the time in Baton Rouge? Or in Savannah? St. Louis? They really know all that shit Ezra? Because if they did, I doubt very much you'd get out of there in one piece."

"You could hardly share those tales without implicating yourself, and I know that is something you would be loathe to do. Your threats have no teeth to them."

"Might be worth it to watch you fall off that high and mighty platform you've set yourself up on."

Ezra chose not to answer. Nothing he could say would convince the man that his past was no longer an issue. How could he convince anyone else of that fact when he usually had trouble accepting it for himself.

"Pack your wagons up and be gone by morning William. There is nothing for you here."

"You got a lot of nerve Standish. You owe me."

Ezra abandoned what was left of his patience. "I owe you nothing. If anything, I have overstepped my bounds and imposed on the trust of others to allow you the opportunity to move on." He turned and started to walk back to Chaucer. "I trust I won't live to regret the decision."

"Don't worry about it. You won't."

Ezra recognized the sound of the spring-loaded derringer holster being released. He turned to dodge the shot, but discovered too late that his adversary had become a much better shot over the years. Pain seared into his back as he fell to the ground.

William walked over and used his foot to flip Ezra onto his back. "Nobody double crosses me, little brother."

M7-M7-M7-M7-M7-M7-M7

 _ **tbc**_


	5. Chapter 5

"Looks like I'm going to be asking your advice again little brother. Didn't expect that to ever happen again. Now, here's what I haven't decided. Do I leave you here for your new friends to find, or do you get to come for a ride?"

"Makes no difference. You were a dead man the minute you pulled that trigger." Ezra fought to stay conscious.

"Well, I guess that's something else we have in common then. Learned a lot more about shooting since we parted ways. You're gonna bleed out over the next few hours. And just to make it more fun, I'll bet it hurts like hell, doesn't it?" William had stripped Ezra of his weapons quickly, but other than that had not come close again. He was hurriedly sorting through his supplies, figuring out what he could take on the back of the horses. He planned to ride one and load down the other. With luck, he would have at least couple of hours head start. "Now I figure they won't be expecting you back for a while, and they won't come looking after dark. And as much as I'd love to lay claim to him, I betting Chaucer's still a one-man beast. Likely throw and stomp me if I try to mount up, won't he?"

Ezra was too busy trying to not pass out to bother answering. Didn't think any comments were needed or expected. "So, I figure to put you on his back and toss the both of you off the next cliff I find." Ezra gasped in pain as he tried to sit up, acting reflexively to protect his steed. It was all he could do to not scream.

"Always been your way William. If you can't have it, you destroy it. Chaucer has done nothing to you. Let him be."

"Sorry Ezra – not my style. Who knows – your friends might actually believe it was an accident. Horse spooked, you couldn't get him back under control and tragedy ensued. No – guess they aren't that stupid." He stepped close to Ezra, squatting down beside him to pull off the boots. "Shit – you really don't have any money on you? Some things never change. You remain a constant disappointment to me." He said, tossing the boots. "But you are right about one thing. When I want something, I take it. And when I no longer can possess it, I destroy it." He stared, maniacal grin in place. Ezra looked up, staring back for what seemed like an eternity as the words slowly registered with him.

"Elizabeth? You Bastard!"

"Ah –no Ezra. We both know our daddy was married to MY mom when I was born. Still married to her when Maude had you. Poor woman really thought she was Mrs. Carson. Can't say I was surprised when she went back to Standish when she finally figured it all out."

"What did you do to Elizabeth?"

"You really want the whole story. Well, I suppose you'll find it interesting." He sat beside the slowly dying man, pushing him aside as he lowered himself. Ezra didn't bother to try to silence the groan.. "Seems a little while back, she started having second thoughts about her choice. Wasn't enjoying the life anymore – like I told you. She got downright difficult about it after a point. Could be because she got tired of getting slapped around, but she did have it coming. Screwed up a couple of jobs in a big way. Guess she counted on your guidance more than either of us realized."

Ezra was exhausting what little strength he had left with the anger he felt growing. He had no idea how, but he was going to see this man dead before he took his own last breath.

"Anyway, one day – oh about a year ago, we were in this general area and heard tell of an Ezra Standish in Four Corners. Well now didn't she get all excited. Said we should go meet up with you, maybe even convince you to come back. Course we'd also heard you'd gone straight. Boring Ezra – very boring. Didn't take a genius to figure she was hoping to settle, not convince you to leave."

No, this couldn't be his fault. Had she died because she wanted to be with him?

"Stupid bitch didn't even bother to deny it. Said she was tired. Was ready to stop. Figured she still had time to have a family – a real life. Stupid bitch." He stood up and went back to his packing. He waited, knowing Ezra would want to know – wouldn't be able to help himself. After a moment, he heard the almost inaudible plea. "What did you do?"

"I'm so glad you asked. Started out by beating her almost senseless. She was crying and moaning - sounded real good. Then I gave her a whole other reason to moan. We hadn't been together for quite some time, and it felt great. Finally ended up by wrapping my hands around that pretty little throat of hers. Choked the life out of her Ezra. Watched the light go out in her eyes. It was exhilarating." Ezra fought back the horror and the nausea. "Then I did the same thing I'm gonna do with you. Dumped her off a cliff into the bush. Nobody ever looked for her, and if they did – well I doubt the animals left even the bones. Tell you what though. I'll take you up to – what the hell was it called – Coyote Gulch. Dump you with her. Won't that be romantic?"

He fought to move, to do something – anything to avenge her death, but Ezra was far too weak to move, let alone stand. He watched as William took the final load of supplies to his horse. Chaucer pulled away as he drew close. "Yeah – what I figured. You trained him to hate everybody but you."

"No, but he is an excellent judge of character."

He went back to loading up. Ezra hated himself for what he was about to do, knowing the likely final consequence. But he had no doubt that Chaucer would have no other chance of survival, and even if this failed, it would allow for some small measure of justice. "Chaucer – 'pousse'." William spun in time to see Chaucer rear back, making solid contact with his front legs to send him sprawling to the ground. He grabbed for his gun but was kicked again by the seemingly possessed horse. He managed to scramble, broken and bleeding out of reach behind a tree. One kick had broken his arm, making the derringer there useless to him. He stumbled to pile of supplies and grabbed his holster from the top, pulling the gun free.

Ezra's enjoyment of the scene ended instantly, and he closed his eyes against the impending death of his oldest friend. He heard the shot and screamed, unable to stop himself. He heard a body fall, and a second later heard Chaucer's anxious bray. He forced his eyes open to see Chaucer looking down on him. "I knew you were smart – didn't know you could shoot?" He realized how ridiculous that sounded, and knew he'd lost to much blood to even think straight anymore.

He tried to pull away as he felt hands pull at him, turning him and pressing into the wound. "You stay with us Ezra. Ezra, you hear me?"

"Chris?"

"That's it. Now I told the others I'd be back with you, so don't you turn me into a liar. Damn it. Open your eyes Ezra. Ezra. Stay awake."

"How is he?" he heard Vin asking.

Chris didn't answer, glaring instead at the man Vin had shot a moment earlier. "He dead?"

"No, but I can change that."

"Don't tempt me. Tie him up, then get your ass back to town and get Nathan out here."

"Don't waste your time Larabee - your boy is a dead man. I'm the one who needs medical help here. I'm bleeding."

"He dies and you'll be right behind him. Shut up or you won't even last that long."

William collapsed back to the ground, trying to use his good hand to staunch the blood flow from his side. Vin kicked the gun out of reach and turned to check on Ezra. Chris was holding him tightly, trying desperately to keep his fingers pressed to the wound.

"Can you hear me Pard? Ezra? You let Chris here take care of you and I'm gonna go get some help."

Ezra forced his eyes open, trying to focus on the voices he heard. How had they others ended up here. He was talking to William, not to his team. They couldn't be here now. Not for this, not to see this. William would tell them all the truth. Their truth. Not that it would matter, he thought, feeling himself grow weaker by the second.

"Killer" he mumbled, looking over to where William was sprawled

"Don't try to talk Ezra. Vin, get your ass moving." The two men focused on their wounded colleague, and neither saw William shifting slowly on the ground behind them. Biting his lip to keep from crying out, he slowly moved his broken arm, intent on getting at the derringer that still hid in the sleeve. Killing these men, in front of Ezra, with a weapon he had inspired, well that was all just too perfect. Sadly for him, he too was keeping his focus on the wrong subject. He never saw Ezra raise Chris's gun, never saw him fire the bullet, and didn't live long enough to have a chance to figure what had happened.

Chris almost leapt to his feet when he heard the shot and felt Ezra's body jump in his arms. Ezra was took weak to resist the recoil from firing the six-shooter. Vin spun to face William, gun drawn, only to realize the fight was over.

"What the hell?" he looked down to see Ezra unconscious again, then he looked to Chris.

"Put my gun beside him - I needed both hands. How the hell did he do that? Why?"

Vin had walked over to the dead man. There was no question on that, with a bullet hole almost perfectly centered in his forehead. He looked down to see the tip of the derringer peaking from the cuff of his jacket.

"He's got Ezra's derringer. Shit, I never saw it. Thought he was disarmed."

"We were both distracted. We'll talk about this later. Right now you gotta ride Vin. Get Nathan back here."

"You keep him alive Chris."

"I aim to try"

M7-M7-M7-M7-M7-M7-M7

 ** _tbc_**


	6. Chapter 6

Nathan threw himself from his horse before it had stopped, almost falling flat on his face in the process. He skidded to a halt beside Chris, who was still holding Ezra tightly. He was almost hoarse from talking non-stop to make sure Ezra knew he wasn't alone, and if the worst happened, didn't die alone.

"He's breathing, but I can hardly feel it. He's so damn cold Nathan. I've been pressing on this but I don't know if it's even helping."

"Don't stop. Buck, help me turn him. Hold him still as you can." He pulled the bloodied shirt clear of the wound. "Shit. It's bad. We can't move him without patching this. Don't let go Chris. Your fingers in him is what's keeping him alive right now. You two are gonna have to hold him. The pain is gonna be bad when I stitch him up, but I can't give him anything to knock him out further."

"What do you want me to do?"

"You just became my assistant Vin. I got to move fast, so you hand me things when I ask."

They'd never seen Nathan work with such speed. Chris could feel the weak trembling as Ezra fought the shock and trauma. He didn't have the strength to pull back, despite the pain. Buck took over the pep talk. "You're doin' real good Ezra. You just keep fighting there. Never known you to quit before. Besides, you got to tell us the story behind all this. You love talking Ezra – you got to hang on to tell us this story."

It felt like forever, but was only a few minutes before Nathan sat back. "You can relax Chris. Got him patched, at least for now. Probably have to fix him up more, but I don't think he can handle it now."

"You stopped the bleeding?"

"Yeah. I just hope it was in time. His pulse is real weak, and you can see how pale he is. But he's trying. That counts for a lot."

"Josiah's coming with a wagon Chris. We'll get him back to town."

"Not tonight we won't Vin." Nathan began fussing around Ezra again. "No way we can move him now. One bump and he'll start bleeding again, and I doubt he'd take kindly to another surgery. You best get the fire going again. Chris, get up and walk around some."

"I'm fine Nathan."

"No, you aren't. You were tight as a tick holding him till we got here, and you haven't backed off since. You don't stretch out some now you won't be able to move tomorrow, and I'm gonna need everybody at the top of their game to help me with him. Do what I say Chris. I don't have the energy to waste fighting with you. I need to focus on Ezra."

"I'll help Vin get some firewood. Buck – sit with Ezra." Buck shifted into place, letting Ezra lean gently into him. "Keep him on his side."

"I know Chris. I got this."

Nathan had been right. Chris moved slowly, hearing his joints crack as he moved for the first time in nearly two hours. He hadn't realized how tense he'd been until he tried to loosen up. There wasn't a muscle that didn't fight him. Vin gave him half a smile. "Ain't as young as you think you are there my friend."

"Yeah, but ain't as old as I feel right now either." The two wandered off slowly, looking for fuel for the fire. "Josiah was right. We shouldn't have let him come out here alone."

"We aren't babysitters Chris. Ezra knew what he was dealing with, or at least thought he did. We had to trust him on this."

"How'd he mess that up so much? How could he not figure on the guy shooting him? In the back?"

"You got me there. Can't figure why Ezra would turn his back on a man he couldn't trust."

"You mean like you did?"

"Yeah, well I admit that was stupid. I didn't figure he'd have hidden gun. Guess I was just to worried about Ezra to think straight."

"I was no better Vin, putting down my weapon like that. Course if I hadn't Ezra couldn't have killed the son of a bitch."

"Doesn't answer why Ezra turned his back."

"He musta trusted this guy. Who the hell was he to do this? Why would he try to kill Ezra? None of it makes sense." A distant sound stopped their conversation. The stood quietly, watching the wagon draw closer, and Chris walked over to greet Josiah while Vin went back to the job he'd set out to do.

"He's hanging on. Nathan's getting him settled for the night. And before you start asking, we don't know anything about what happened. He's in no condition to tell us, and neither is the other fella." Josiah looked to the covered body with a look that said he'd like to kill the man again, preferably slowly and painfully, then he made his way over to Ezra. He looked down, still not speaking. It tore at his heart to watch the laboured breathing and see the sheen of sweat coating his pale face. He watched the struggle for each breath, and the fact he could do nothing to help was more than he could handle.

"He's not giving up Josiah – neither are we. Understand?" The only answer Nathan got was a quick glance before the big man went back to the wagon. He pulled out a couple of blankets, came back to Ezra's side and sat down, resting against the tree. Nothing short of an act of God was going to move him from that spot until it was time to go home.

The fever started in the middle of the night. Chris was back holding Ezra in position when he noticed the shudders passing through the wounded man. His first thought was that the night chill was taking hold, but brushing his hand against Ezra's face while reaching for another blanket, he could feel the heat. He barely got the call out to Nathan before the healer was by his side. The other men were roused from their rest. None had been really sleeping so the first hint of trouble had them on alert. They watched anxiously and were stunned by the grin they saw Nathan displaying.

"Fever's low. The wound is clean. No pus or seepage. And he ain't bleeding anymore." He looked at the others and saw their confusion. "His body is just fighting off any chance of trouble. He's starting to heal up. Can't say for absolute, but I think he's past the worst. Tougher than he looks."

Vin sat next to Chris. "Go lie down. I'll stay with him for the rest of the night."

Chris started to argue before realizing he simply didn't have the energy. "OK – sounds good. Buck, you need to head back at first light." Before he could challenge the order, Chris cut him off. "JD's gonna be going crazy waiting to hear, and likely not the only one. Besides, you need to relieve him on town patrol. We won't be in until mid-day at best, 'cause even when we can move him, it'll be a slow ride."

"Fine, but you guys don't show up by dinner time I'll be back. Gotta admit, it'll be good to see the look on the kid's face when I tell him our boy is gonna be OK."

The rest of the night was quiet, with no movement from anyone until about the same time as the sky began to lighten. Vin felt some movement, and looked down to see Ezra staring up at him.

"I take it I survived." The voice was weak, but the tone was Ezra at his best.

"Looks that way. No, stay still Ezra. Wouldn't want Nathan's work to get messed up."

"Heaven forbid. Vin?"

"Yes?"

"Chaucer?"

"The hero of the day is fine. Never seen an animal pull off a trick like that. When you're stronger you'll have to explain it to me."

"He speaks French." Vin pretended to understand what Ezra was meant by that.

"William?"

"He'd dead Ezra."

"Good." He closed his eyes, but Vin could tell he hadn't drifted off again. He waited to see if there was more to be said, but Ezra remained silent. When Buck rose to get ready to leave, Ezra opened his eyes again, and made an effort to speak.

"Save your strength there. You're gonna need it to deal with those potions Nathan is bound to start mixing up for you. I'm going back to town, but I'll be seeing you later – right?" He was rewarded with a small nod, and was able to ride off a few minutes later with a smile that he hadn't expected to be wearing.

The morning went by quickly, with the biggest problem being keeping the men from fussing over Ezra, who remained feverish and restless. Every twitch or moan brought everyone to his side, and Nathan was wishing Chris had ordered them all back to town, and left with them. That changed when the time came to move Ezra to the wagon.

"Can't see how we can do this without it hurting some Ez, but we'll be as smooth as we can. Vin, you get up there first. Want you to ride in the wagon with me. It'll take the two of us to hold him still as we can if the road gets rough. Chris, you'll ride ahead to help Josiah steer the horses away from as much of the rough as possible. He needs a smooth ride, and we're counting on you to deliver it."

Moving Ezra was every bit as painful, for all of them, as Nathan had expected. By the time he was settled, he was drenched in sweat, his face tight with pain. Chris had used more swear words than Nathan knew existed, and Josiah's prayers had taken a decidedly dark turn. Vin was quiet, but his eyes glistened with tears for what they'd put their friend through.

Nathan approached Chris, watching him look at the bundled corpse. "I'm not putting him in the wagon with Ezra."

"Didn't expect you would." Nathan agreed with the decision.

"Josiah suggested we could leave him here for the animals. Or maybe drag him into town behind us."

"We're better than that Chris."

"Didn't say we were gonna do it. Just said it was a suggestion." Reluctantly, he signaled Josiah over, and the two men hoisted the corpse onto one of the horses. "We ready to move out?"

"Let's give Ezra a few minutes to settle in. Vin's talking with him. Likely be drifting off again soon, and we'll move out then."

Nathan was right, as Ezra could feel himself fading again. He had to be sure of things before he dared to sleep again. "Vin – you sure he'd dead?"

"No doubt about it. You shot him Ezra. You saved me and Chris by doin' it."

"I did?" He had no memory of that. "He deserved it. He killed her you know." Vin felt a pit in his stomach, understanding instantly, and knowing how much that news would have hurt.

"Damn Ezra – I'm sorry."

Ezra didn't really hear him. "Shouldn't have done that. Killed her and dumped her. Vin he shouldn't have done that."

Ezra was getting himself worked up, and that wasn't going to make the ride any easier. "Don't fret on it now Ezra. We'll figure out how to make it right, but we gotta take you home now."

"No, not home. Gulch. Coyote Gulch. We have to get her first."

"Nathan, I need some help here. He's fighting me and I don't want to hurt him."

The healer was in the wagon in an instant, and forcing liquid into Ezra, rubbing slowly at his throat to encourage him to swallow as much as possible. "Should put him to sleep, or at least settle him some. Don't want to give him too much, but he's going to hurt himself worse if he keeps trying to move." They waited a few minutes and when it looked like sleep had finally arrived, the slow trek home began.

M7-M7-M7-M7-M7-M7-M7


	7. Chapter 7

For the two days after the team arrived in Four Corners Ezra was never alone. Nathan was with him almost every minute, although some of that was spent sleeping on a floor mat next to the bed while the others took turns keeping an eye on the patient. JD took first watch, refusing to accept that everything was in fact going to be all right. "I'll believe it when I hear if from him." was his response to reassurances. Given that Ezra remained unconscious and feverish, JD failed to have his wish answered. Eventually he was driven out of the room, ordered to get some rest himself. The pattern continued, with everyone stubbornly trying to outwait the slow recovery. Only Vin was missing from the rotation.

After arriving in Four Corners, and fending off concerned townsfolk who all wanted to see for themselves that the team was intact, Vin informed Chris he was leaving town.

"I can't tell you why Chris. It's not my place to say."

"This has to do with what Ezra was mumbling about in the wagon?" Vin nodded. "You do know he was out of his head with fever? What he said might not even be what he was thinking."

"Fever wasn't that bad Chris. And truth is, I know I'm probably wasting my time. But I have to do this. I'll be back as soon as I can."

"You know what you're doing?"

Vin just shrugged. "Maybe – at least I got a couple of ideas on how to start. Do me a favour – don't let him know I'm gone on his account. If this doesn't work out, he doesn't need to know I even tried."

"I'll do that if you promise me when you come back you'll explain all this – even if it doesn't work out."

"If it works, I won't need to explain anything."

Now, on the third day after the shooting, Ezra was awake and, for the most part, aware of what had gone on. He still didn't have the strength to fight off a six-week-old kitten, but the colour was returning to his face, and he could actually move without feeling like a hot poker was in his back. He opened his eyes to look at JD in response to a light tapping on the door.

"Please Mr. Dunne, if that is our esteemed healer with another of his vile potions, shoot me now and spare me the misery."

"They aren't that bad Ezra – and they're getting you better."

"It is too steep a price to pay."

"No. It isn't. It really isn't. Don't say things like that Ezra. This one was too close."

"My apologies. I did not mean to dismiss your concerns so lightly. Ah, Mr. Larabee. You are here to relieve our young sheriff of his monitoring duties?"

"I'm here to visit with a friend, and to give JD a chance to get some lunch. Go on kid, I got this covered."

"I'll be back later Ezra." JD was gone from the room in the blink of an eye.

"That boy has entirely too much energy. I do not believe that even at his age, I was that young."

"I'm guessing you were never that young Ezra, but that's a story for another time. You're looking a lot better."

"It is mostly an illusion in an effort to dissuade Mr. Jackson from requiring me to take more of his 'cures'. I regret to say he is not easily fooled."

"If you stopped wasting energy fighting him, you'd get better a lot faster."

"Yes, but it would damage my reputation."

"Stop thinking about your reputation and start thinking about getting better Ezra. You scared the crap out of us."

"I was none to pleased with the unfolding of events myself." Ezra's tone was light, but his face failed to reflect any humour. It was obvious he didn't yet have the energy to keep his emotions hidden.

"Tell me Mr. Larabee. Some of my memories of the last few days are a trifle muddled. Did I, in some way, offend Mr. Tanner?"

"Vin hasn't been in to see you because he had to go out of town. Something urgent came up, and as soon as he knew you were gonna be OK he hightailed it out."

"I trust he has not put himself in any danger? He should not have gone off alone."

"Oh, but it was fine for you to go into what you had to know was a bad situation on your own? Don't worry about Vin. I can't say for sure myself what he's doing, but he's fine. Got a telegram from him from White Rock just a while ago saying he'd be back late tomorrow if the traveling is good or the next morning at the latest."

"I will accept your assurance on his welfare. And as for my misadventure, I can promise you if I had considered even for an instant that this would be the outcome I would have taken every opportunity to approach the matter differently."

"Only thing that really matters is that it worked out. Wasn't pretty, but it worked out."

Ezra settled back, waiting for the question he was sure would follow. When nothing more was said, he opened his eyes again to make sure he hadn't been left alone. Chris remained where he had been, just smiling. It was actually a little unnerving.

"Let me save you the trouble Ezra. Yes, we all want to know what happened. Want to know why that son of a bitch shot you in the back. But it doesn't take to much figuring to realize whatever happened was real personal. And, we know you don't like to talk about your past – not parts like this. That picture, the shooting. Damn right we're curious. But as long as you aren't in danger – we aren't in danger – then we don't **need** to know."

"He told you nothing?"

"Didn't live long enough to. And while we are on the subject - that was some mighty fine shooting from a man at death's door."

"I regret to say I cannot remember the incident. I do hope, in time, the memory returns. I believe it is one I shall cherish."

Chris was surprised by the comment. Ezra was far from the blood thirsty type, and tended to prefer to leave vengeance to the rest of the team. He preferred to get even by more profitable means where possible. Of course, being shot in the back might change that perspective in any man.

"We don't want to push you Ezra. Like I said, it's clear this has been hard on you. I got just one concern. Need to know this is over. With that son of a bitch dead, are you done with it, or do we need to on the watch for someone else in this story."

"There is no one else in the story. Not any more." The sadness in Ezra's voice just about broke Chris's heart.

"So we don't have to worry that he had kin that'll come after you. Father, brother – anything like that."

Had he not been certain the action would have torn out the stitches, Ezra would have laughed. Long and hard. Instead he settled for an off-kilter smile. "William's family is of no consequence as far as I can determine. He had only the one brother I am aware of, and I can assure you he will not be causing further problems." Ezra looked at the concern the was evident on the face of the man staring back at him.

"But you are wrong Mr. Larabee. I do owe you an explanation. All of you. I ask only your indulgence in waiting for Mr. Tanner to return. I would prefer to tell the tale only once, and he should not have to hear it second hand."

"Like I said Ezra – it's up to you. You need to get some rest, but I do have one question if you can handle that."

"I shall try."

"I get that you like to go formal with us down at the tables, or in public. Mister so-and-so is all part of the image. But lately, especially when we're on our own, and most especially when you've been hurt, or one of us has, you drop that crap. Now we're all Mister again. Hell, you call the bastard that shot you by his first name, but we're all mister again? What happened?"

"The answer to that is part of the story. I think when you hear it you will understand my reluctance to presume to consider you as friends."

"Doubt there is much you can say that would make that true. You gotta understand we don't care about your past anymore Ezra. We know your present, and hope to hell we know your future. You worked hard to leave that behind and as far as I can see, you've done a hell of a job. When you're feeling better, and when Vin is back, we're gonna have our talk. For now – you rest."

M7-M7-M7-M7-M7-M7-M7


	8. Chapter 8

It was actually late in the afternoon of the second day before Vin rode into town. Leaving his horse with Tiny to take care of, he made one other quick stop before heading toward Nathan's clinic. Chris called out to him from behind as he reached the door.

"He's not there."

Vin felt his stomach drop. He turned slowly, stunned grief on his face. "He was getting better Chris. I wouldn't have left-"

"Whoa, slow down. He's fine. Well – he's OK. We moved him back to his room a few hours ago. His bed is easier on his back. Nathan's there with him."

The glare he favoured Chris with was beyond harsh. "You couldn't have just said he's in his room? Scared the shit out of me."

"Sorry. Whoa there, hang on." He grabbed the tracker's arm as he passed by. "Nathan won't let you in the building, let alone the room like that. Like I said, he's better but that doesn't mean he's back to being himself, and the last thing he needs is to end up with another fever. Go wash off at least half of that dirt before you see him."

"How's he really doing?"

"Never seen him like this. He's – I don't know what the word is. Lost?"

"He's grieving Chris."

"No way. I know there was some kind of history with that bastard but-"

"Not for him. There's more to it. I guess he hasn't said anything."

"Waiting for you to get back."

"Tell him I'm here. I'll be up to see him in a couple minutes."

"Take more than a couple Vin – you're filthy."

He now stood outside Ezra room, waiting till Nathan granted him permission to enter. He heard Ezra moan softly just once as the bandages were changed and the wound checked. He couldn't help but smile to himself. A splinter or scrape and Ezra would complain for days. Put a bullet in the man's back and you wouldn't hear a sound from him. He was, as Josiah had once said, a walking contradiction.

Chris arrived while he was still waiting, and Vin knew he was being quietly checked over. "Do I pass inspection?" "Well, I don't see much dirt, and you smell better, so I guess you'll do." Fortunately, the door opened before Vin could voice his response.

"He's tired. The move over here started some bleeding again, and took more out of him than he'll admit to. You get him riled or upset and you'll answer to me." Both men gave him a 'who me' kind of look, but nodded agreement when Nathan refused to open the door wide enough for them to pass.

"Well you look more that a bit better than the last time I saw you Pard."

"I am feeling perfectly fine and fail to see why there is such a commotion about a simple scratch." No one bothered to dignify the claim with a response. "It is good to have you back Mr. Tanner."

"It was Vin last time."

"As I discussed with Mr. Larabee, that is a situation still to be determined. I assume the others will be arriving shortly."

"We don't have to do this now Ezra. Or at all if you don't feel up to it."

"Yes, we do. You all deserve an explanation, and I hope I shall rest better once it has been offered." Further discussion was curtailed by the arrival of Buck and JD.

"Well now don't you look comfortable." Buck lied. "I should be sleeping in fancy deal like that bed. Course, I'm so rarely in my own bed it likely wouldn't be worth the bother."

"You might be pleasantly surprised to discover all of the comforts of a fine feather bed. A good sleep is only one benefit." His smile turned to a grimace when the bed was bumped slightly as Buck moved toward a chair.

"Shit Ezra, I'm sorry. Too damn clumsy for my own good."

"Not to worry. It's nothing."

"The hell it's nothing." Nathan replied. "Forget this. He needs to rest."

"Please. I promise if it becomes too much I will desist. But I need to do this more than I need the rest."

"Means all that to you?" Ezra nodded slightly, and Nathan surrendered. "I'll put a stop to it if I have to, but I'm gonna trust you to let me know when you're hurting. Josiah's gonna be a few minutes, so I want you to just lie still for now." Ezra closed his eyes in acquiescence, and was asleep almost instantly. They all sat quietly, signally Josiah to do the same when he arrived. It was over an hour until Ezra woke again, but they gave him no indication that time had passed. Before he could start, Nathan laid out the rules.

"Ezra is in charge of this, and I'm the only one who can override him. He tells what he has to say. No questions, no interrogations. If there are any problems that come from what he has to say, they can keep. Understood?"

"There won't be any problems Nathan." Chris all but ordered the others to comply. "They'll behave."

"You do know he was talking mostly to you – right?" Buck asked. Ezra started before the discussion went further.

"You may recall Mr. Sanchez, on our first venture together, I told you of the time I spent preaching the word of God. I believe you were less than impressed by my use of the pulpit as a financial opportunity, but such are the ways of the confidence man. I did mislead you slightly on why I gave up that avenue of earnings. It was not that I was caught with the mayor's daughter, but rather my accomplice was. He was a difficult man to control at the best of times. And yes, that was our 'Brother Bill.' His real name was William Carson."

"Told us it was Tomlinson"

"He lied. Hardly a surprise. In those days, he did not usually take the role of the clergy. That fell to me. Reverend Taylor, Pastor Davis or any one of a dozen other names that fit our purpose. William was my 'manager'. It was unseemly for a man of God to ask for money, but for a layman assisting in the cause – that was acceptable. And more often than not it allowed him to romance the occasional wealthy widow." He paused to catch his breath.

"We were still quite new to the operation when fate stepped in. Mother was in the town we stopped at, with a young protégé of her own. Elizabeth. Never had I seen another woman like her. The most faithful husband would turn his gaze to watch her pass. The most perfect sunrise paled in comparison." He looked at the others. "Yes, I know how it sounds, but every word is true. I was smitten. William also saw her beauty, but he was the first to attach a value to it." Reading the thoughts of his companions was far too easy. "No gentlemen, not in the way you are thinking. I have no idea if she was pure when we met, but I can assure you no actions on our part, or rather my part, compromised her in any such way." Ezra paused briefly to rein in his emotions.

"She did, however, fit into our scenario in a manner that was beyond beneficial. Depending on the town, and the nature of the task at hand, she was the minister's wife or sister. Or took that position with William at her side. Whatever the title, the roll was the same. She drew the crowds to our revivals. She would perform – sing revival hymns that had the audience begging for more. I often thought we weren't really conning anyone out of their savings. They received more that full value for their donation every time she sang." Nathan bit back the comment he had in mind we he saw the look of total adoration on Ezra's face.

"She was that good?" Josiah asked.

"The only time I have ever believed that the angels you speak of might really exist was when I heard that voice. I wasn't alone. Our success tripled when she was with us. Crowds were large and word spread in the south of her gift. I tried to encourage her to turn to the stage. To be accurate, I begged her to. She deserved to find a legitimate venue for her voice. Sadly, she preferred a life of daring and risk. She was infatuated with the thrill of the game, and…" he faded off, looking away for a moment.

"And with William?" Chris asked softly.

"He epitomized the adventure she craved. He was daring, audacious and without conscience. All the attributes she found so exhilarating. I, on the other hand, had been raised with just enough southern gentlemen in me to make me boring and predictable by comparison."

JD laughed. He couldn't help himself. "Sorry Ezra, but if there were ever two word I would use on you, they'd be boring and predictable."

"But you are not a young woman in quest of excitement. She was."

"That what caused you to split up? Damn – sorry Ezra. I'll shut up."

"I don't mind clarifying things JD – I ask only patience. I have an order to my tale, and it is easier for me to follow it. Yes, eventually it ended our partnership. I could no longer stand to watch the way William used her. Manipulated her for his own goals. And, although none of you are asking, yes, I do appreciate the irony of the situation."

"Just proves you never were as heartless as you wanted us to think Ezra." Vin observed.

"I think it actually ended up proving the opposite. I became quite determined when I left to never again allow anything as trivial as emotion to factor into my efforts. Shutting oneself away from such encumbrances does make the task of lying and cheating far easier." He was too tired to hide the bitterness in his voice. Nathan took one look at the strain on his face and called a halt to the story.

"You need to rest Ezra. This isn't helping you."

"Yes, it is Mr. Jackson. Please, I assure you I can continue. There is not much more to tell. If I might have some water?" All six of the men moved to offer it. Nathan's glare sent the others back to their chairs, but brought a small smile to Ezra.

A few minutes later, he resumed the tale. "I wasn't just placating Mr. Jackson. There really is little left of the story. I heard tell from time to time of a young woman with amazing vocal talents who was performing in the eastern cities, but made no effort to investigate. I didn't really want to know where they were. Mother mentioned seeing them once, but again, I did not press her for details. I had, in many ways, put them out of my mind after settling here. It was only your description of William that triggered the memory. I confess to considering just riding out of town in the opposite direction, rather than deal with seeing him, or them, again."

"Why didn't you?" Chris already knew the answer, but wanted to be sure Ezra did as well. The wry smile let him know Ezra was on to him.

"You would say it is because I am not that man anymore. I would temper that by saying I am constantly trying to not be that man. I think, in this case I succeeded." He leaned back into his pillows, closing his eyes again. "I realize Mr. Jackson laid out rules, but I have no doubt there are myriad questions you wish to ask. Proceed, but one at a time please."

"They'll keep Ezra."

"No. I would like to conclude this today, and avoid any future reference to the event. I can start things for you. I can only assume the first question would be 'just who is William, and why did he shoot you in the back?'"

"Now that you mention it..." Buck agreed.

"We had what one might call a history together, even before worked our charms on the unsuspecting public. I don't recall our initial meeting, given I was an infant at the time, but that is how far back the connection goes. For all of our differences, the was one common connection that couldn't be changed. We shared the same father."

M7-M7-M7-M7-M7-M7-M7

 _ **tbc**_


	9. Chapter 9

"He was your brother?" "Your brother shot you in the back?" Nathan stood, bringing instant silence to the room. "What did I tell you guys?"

"It's alright Mr. Jackson. I expected nothing less. Yes, we were brothers. Half-brothers to be precise. And no Mr. Larabee, I shall not lose sleep over my act of fratricide. From what I understand, his intention was to kill both you and Mr. Tanner, and for that alone he deserved his fate. I assure you, there are many additional crimes he had to answer for."

Buck looked at his friend. "Would you mind terribly if I dug the bastard up so I could have a shot at him?"

"Actually, that title is mine. Mother believed herself to be wed to Richard Carson at the time of my birth, and it was over a year until she discovered otherwise. That happened when he showed up with a 5-year-old William in hand, having left the child's mother, his legal wife, behind somewhere in New York. I would prefer to leave the details of the next years out of this discussion. The memories are less than pleasant, and telling them would serve no purpose.

 _In other words_ , Chris thought, _Maude comes off less than favorably_. Still, nothing was to be gained by putting Ezra through the telling, so he nodded his agreement on behalf of all of them. "Like we said Ezra – as much or as little as you want to share."

"When it was over, I was informed that I would not bear the burden of his last name, and took that of my mother instead. Suffice to say circumstance brought us together again in later years. Richard had vanished at some point. His fate remains unknown to me, and now likely will forever be a mystery. That does not concern me in the least. William proposed a family business, and our connection was formed. We went on for several years, not always working together, but often. Then came what I had assumed would be a final parting. His arrival here fulfilled one of my worst nightmares. I firmly believed that his presence would bring to an end my time with you men."

"Damn near did." Buck growled. "But I'm bettin' that wasn't what you were thinking."

"William Carson is – was – an evil man. I did not fully appreciate that until it was too late for me to fully disassociate myself. And even then I had no concept of the depths to which the man could sink. Nevertheless, I was a party to much of what he did, and as such carry the responsibility."

"Don't know how many times we have to tell you Ezra. Your past is none of our concern."

"There are criminal considerations involved in this Mr. Larabee. We are supposed to be lawmen, are we not?"

"And if someone comes to arrest you we'll deal with it. We've got no posters on you and you've been long since pardoned for the one charge we know about. The rest doesn't exist."

"I think you've paid for your sins son. More than paid."

"Others have paid for them too Mr. Sanchez. That is my fault." Ezra's voice was getting weaker as he fought to maintain an appearance of detachment. He feared he would lose his composure at any moment, and wished he had agreed to earlier efforts to end the discussion.

Chris thought back to what Vin had told him earlier in the day, and finally saw the pieces fall into place. "Elizabeth made her own choices Ezra. She could have easily gone with you, but chose not to. Whatever happened there, it's not your fault."

"I never should have left her with him. I should have seen what would happen."

"How were you supposed to do that? You have the ability to see read the future Ezra? Were you supposed to make yourself miserable because she didn't know a good thing when she say it?" Buck challenged. "You're better off."

"He killed her." Ezra spoke so softly it was barely audible, but it stopped all of the them instantly. "He gloated about it after shooting me. Told me far more than I needed to know. I have no doubt she suffered. And I have no doubt it was because she wanted to leave him. She had heard I was settled her, and that she wanted to find me again. He killed her because of me." He sobbed out the last words, finally losing the control he'd fought so hard to maintain. Nathan made a move to go to his side, but Chris was there faster.

"He killed her because he was one sick son of a bitch. That's not on you. It's not on her either. All him Ezra. Just like you guys managed to convince me the Ella is to blame for Sarah and Adam, you've got to see that he's to blame for Elizabeth. I'm not going to let you fall down the hole I lived in for all that time after I lost my family. Not happening Ezra."

"I should have known."

"You couldn't Son. There's no shame in that."

"He didn't even have the decency to see that she was buried Chris." Ezra was shaking, overcome. "He left her to rot out there. How could he…" Ezra stopped, unable to speak any further.

Vin move over and nudge Chris away. "Ezra, do you remember talking to me in the wagon? When we were bringing you back? You told me some of this then. Told me what he did." Ezra shook his head, not able to look at any of them. "You told me what he said. That's why I haven't been here. I went to the Seminole Village, they contacted some others. I found what he called Canyon Gulch. We call it Whistler Canyon. Ezra. Ezra look at me. I found her Ezra."

He looked up, stunned into silence. "I found Elizabeth for you Ezra."

"How?"

Vin smiled slightly. "Cause I'm as good at tracking as you are at cards. Once I knew the area, it wasn't too hard to find the most likely place he would – well – do what he did. Then I went down and started hunting. I brought back what I could find Ezra. You can bury her proper like." He waited for a moment then pulled away. "Nathan, something's wrong." The healer moved in quickly, but relaxed after a quick look.

"Basically, he fainted. He tired himself out, then all this is just too much. Out – all of you. I'll stay here, but nobody needs to talk to him any more tonight. Or tomorrow. He's got to sleep."

"I'm staying here Nathan. There's one more thing to tell him, and you got to trust me, it'll help him." Nathan looked at Vin and realized there was no point in arguing. "Fine, but don't wake him. When he comes to on his own you can talk to him – if he feels up to it. The rest of you – leave. And somebody bring us back some dinner."

7-7-7-7-7-7-7

Nathan was sleeping on the floor mat when Ezra awoke again several hours later, trying to sit up and gasping in pain. Vin rested his hand gently on the wounded man's arm. "It's OK Ezra. I'm here." Nathan sat up immediately, but Vin signaled him to stay where he was. After a moment, Ezra's breathing returned to normal.

"You needn't be here Mr. Tanner. You should be resting."

"I'm exactly where I should be, and for the last time, knock of the Mister crap. Nothing you said, nothing that has happened has changed the way any of us feel about you. No, that's not true. If anything, I have more respect for you. You faced down this demon in a way that took a lot of courage. I'm sorry my carelessness meant you had to kill your brother."

"He was not by brother Vin. Yes, we were connected by blood, but that is all there was. I have come to learn that the bonds of family reach far beyond that connection. I have no regrets for my actions. If that makes be me a callous, cold-blooded man, so be it."

"No way Ezra. You're a good man. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise." Ezra was quiet for a time, and Vin was almost convinced he'd gone back to sleep, until the whispered question came.

"You really found her?"

"Yeah Ezra. I wish I could have done more."

"Nothing more could be done Mist- Vin. You have no idea what it means to me. To know she isn't abandoned to the elements forever. I cannot believe you were able to retrieve – anything."

"I won't lie. It's not a lot, but I think something is better than nothing – right?"

"Assuredly." Ezra was fighting hard to keep his voice from breaking. "But it is the act of doing it, the effort made that means so much to me. Especially now."

"There's something else Ezra, if you feel up to it." He got a small nod, so continued. "I found something of hers there. Looks like he left her bag and purse when he – left her there. Wasn't too much left of them. Nothing worth saving. But they served to protect something. There was a necklace. A locket. It was under the bag, kind of protected from everything. It was dirty, but still in one piece." He dug into his pocket and laid the treasure in Ezra's outreached hand. He clasped in tightly, using more strength than Vin would have expected he still possessed.

"I think you'll want to see the picture."

"No, I don't. I remember the piece. It was from the same picture I showed you before. William had it printed up small for her. Him on one side, her gazing at him from the other. I don't need to see what's inside, but I will treasure the piece. Thank you, Vin."

Vin took it from his hand and opened the charm. "She changed it Ezra. She must have saved a copy of that picture, because she changed what's in here. He ain't there Ez. You are. You had the place near her heart." He turned it toward Ezra. Through tear filled eyes, Ezra could see his face looking longingly at Elizabeth, but now, she looked back at him. He knew that while it didn't reflect the reality of that moment, it did seem to reflect the passage of time.

"I have no words. There is no way to thank you."

"Yeah, there is. You let yourself off on this. What happened was wrong, but it wasn't your fault. You got to remember she cared for you when all was done. That's the only important thing in this. There rest is just history. Go to sleep Ezra. You want to thank me, you get yourself better. That's all I need. All we need." He waited till Ezra was sleeping, then quietly left the room. 

Elizabeth was buried in the town cemetery three weeks later when Ezra was strong enough, in every sense, to attend. He stood, surround by the men who were his family by choice. A bond stronger than any blood ties could ever be.

M7-M7-M7-M7-M7-M7-M7

The End


End file.
